Jenny Eden Berk

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Why you lose steam with healthy behaviors late in the day

Have you ever woken up and felt really determined to have a healthy eating day? 


Or ever feel motivated to have a day filled with self-care like meditation, exercise and adequate hydration only to lose time or even the will to even care by the end of the day?


One of the reasons why we so quickly “give up” on our plan to get healthy or practice healthy lifestyle behaviors is because making lifestyle changes are hard and don’t just “happen.”  We live in a society that runs so counter to healthy living that any consistency has to be backed up by more than just sheer will and hoping for the best.


Your challenges will be many and will come in the most unexpected ways at times.


Examples: 

  • Your co-worker brings in extra cake from her birthday and has it out for everyone.


  • Your gym closed early for a water pipe leak and since you don’t have a back-up plan for moving, you do nothing.


  • You have a plan to make a healthy fish and veggie dinner but then your friends invite you out for drinks and dinner at the new gastro-pub near you and #frieshappen


Call it motivation, call it “willpower” or anything else you like but there are many reasons why your ability to make healthy choices or practice healthy behaviors crashes by the end of the day and none of them have to do with laziness, gluttony or failure.


Here are the main psychological, physical and emotional/behavioral reasons why our momentum crashes by the end of the day. (and some solutions to try)


Decision fatigue 

If you’ve had to make many decisions throughout the day, your brain will become fatigued and any additional decisions (especially around food) become much more difficult.  This means that if you don’t have a plan in place for dinner or how you’ll exercise etc, it likely won’t just happen.


Solution/ Strategy: Make a meal plan for the week, set up a time to meal prep so you don’t have to make decisions later during the day.  Or try a Meal Kit delivery service


Decompressing 

Part of how we relax at the end of a long day with many tasks and responsibilities is by decompressing.  Sometimes this includes watching TV while snacking or telling yourself you’ll rest now and will promise to workout tomorrow.  A body in motion stays in motion, and a body at rest stays at rest.  I’m a huge proponent of rest and decompressing, but just know that once that decision is made, it’s difficult to back-track and then decide to whip up a balanced, healthy meal or go on the peloton.  


Solution/Strategy:  Try the when/then technique.  Eg. “When I finish 15-minutes of yoga, then I’ll relax on the couch with a snack”


Exhaustion 

It speaks for itself.  When you’re physically tired, mentally exhausted or emotionally overwhelmed that will translate into inaction and/or make it feel impossible to do anything for yourself at the end of the day, even if you really really want to.


Solution/ Strategy: Optimize your sleep and set up a sleep and wind down ritual to help you get both the quantity your body needs but also the quality sleep that will make a difference in your stamina and circadian rhythm which affects your mood, energy levels and even hunger hormones.


Old habits want to persist!

As humans we always have the desire to avoid pain and seek pleasure.  When you are stressed, tired, or sick  you’re going to be most likely to revert back to the habits and behaviors that feel familiar, well-worn and comfortable, even if they aren’t particularly healthy for you..  It’s important to realize why this happens so that when it does, you can lean into self-compassion and gentleness rather than criticism and toxic negative thoughts about yourself.  


Solution /Strategy:  Self-compassion goes a long way here. Remind yourself that this is a path, not a destination. Remind yourself that when you are stressed, unwell physically or going through a big change like a move, a job change or a divorce, you are more likely to see yourself backsliding to older unhelpful behaviors.  Take steps to calm and recalibrate your nervous system or take a break from having any expectations of yourself during particularly difficult times.



Black & White thinking 

If you’re someone who has had to force yourself in the past to get on an elliptical or to eat a piece of broccoli and it doesn’t feel natural, black & white thinking can easily derail you.  Let’s say the day is going great: You’re drinking your water, exercised in the morning and did some meal prepping the night before so that you’d have healthy snacks and lunch on hand during the day.  Out of nowhere you’re offered some candy or a piece of chocolate which you enjoy and determine that the healthy day you’ve built is lost because of one decision in one moment.  The truth is that one piece of chocolate or one unhealthy meal will not make or break your week or your goals unless you engage in binary or black and white thinking.  This may look like you saying to yourself “well since I screwed up earlier, I might as well just eat whatever I want when I get home.”


Solution/ Strategy: After a set back, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and do the next best thing or one positive step forward.  Have a glass of water, walk around outside for 10 minutes, eat a fruit or vegetable.  You’ll be surprised how that 1 step forward will keep your momentum going.


Not enough pleasure/fun/play during the day

If you’ve said “no” all day to things you find pleasurable (including food), there is going to be a rebellious side to you by the end of the day that wants to say “eff it” and just do whatever is pleasurable in that moment even if it means polishing off your kids left-over mac & cheese or deciding against going on the treadmill for 20 minutes.  If you don’t give yourself opportunities for pleasure and fun, your inner rebel will make it happen one way or another.


Solution /Strategy: Make a pleasure inventory of all the things that give you joy, pleasure and fulfillment big and small.  Aim to plug and play at least 1-2 things per day interspersed between your responsibilities.


Remember that making lasting and consistent lifestyle changes takes more than just drive and determination but also compassion, patience and flexibility.


Compassionate lifestyle and behavioral modification is part of what I teach in my signature 6-month 1:1 program called Replenish. Learn more about replenish and fill out an application today!